This is a continuation of the “Conversation Capital” post.

We engage in rituals all the time, probably with out realizing it. These little things we do before an event that “mark the experience as deeper in meaning” are everywhere. Think about it. You shake someone’s hand when you’ve met them for the first time, you say “cheers” before a beer with friends, and you make popcorn before you sit down to watch a movie. These are all rituals.

But why are they so important, especially with regard to creating experiences that will generate conversation? According to the authors of “Conversation Capital,” “rituals are an essential part of how human beings create and formalize meaning…They make experiences more memorable and worthy of conversation.” Simply, rituals are such an ingrained part of being human that to omit them from your experience would be to omit something very important. The reasons may be intangible, but rituals define us. Rituals elevate what we do, thereby elevating our self-worth. And this is essential for conversation because we love to talk about ourselves.

Particularly well done is the unboxing of an Apple product. Many people have elevated this ‘task’ to something resembling a religious experience. Don’t believe me? Go to Youtube and search “apple unboxing” and you’ll get over 45,000 videos of people describing this ritual in the utmost of detail. Yes, it’s so important to them that they want to share every minute of it. And what’s more, people want to watch it — some of these videos have been viewed hundreds of thousands of times. There’s no denying, this is one ritual that generates a lot of conversation.

But wait! Rituals don’t have to divine; they don’t even have to be pleasant. Instead, we can create initiations — “rights of passage that serve as transitions from the banal…into the meaningful.”  They usually involve discomfort, sacrifice, and/or delayed gratification. Think standing in line before entering a club or driving hours in traffic for a weekend getaway. These initiations are sufficiently unpleasant as to cause some sort of  ”dramatic tension,” but in the end, the reward greatly outweighs the sacrifice.

In the realm of retail, there are many of the same old initiations. There’s always the line-up at the checkout, the process of trying clothes on, or perhaps even the wait to enter the store (if the store is so lucky). That being said, Lululemon has come up with an innovative way of integrating a unique initiation into their guest experience. What is it? Lululemon has the hem.

Getting your pants hemmed is one more hurdle to jump if you want that perfect pair. Well actually, it’s several hurdles: Try them on, stand on a stool in the change-room hallway, have someone adjusting your pant leg to your liking, fill out a form to record your name and number, wait for five days while the pants are sent away, and finally return with your piece of paper to pick the pants up. Phew!

Having to do all that makes actually makes the purchase more valuable. Why? The truth is, people like challenges. It goes back to the reason initiations are meaningful in the first place: they are necessary for the feeling of exclusivity. By going through discomfort, one is set apart from the rest, and is able to elevate their perceived level of importance relative to others. Not only that, it makes you part of a select group and gives you a sense of belonging. And — once again — because we love to talk about ourselves, our achievements and triumphs always make it into our conversations.

Insight: At the end of the day, it’s not only about the product — as the authors of the book will tell you, a great product is merely the price of admission. It’s about appealing to and satisfying our base needs and desires. A truly great consumer experience will creating a sense of belonging, importance, and achievement. A truly great brand understands this and will link their product to something deeper. Creating rituals or initiations is just one way to do so.